Well, I can't actually remember when I last updated this, and quite frankly I don't want to look. There's to much pain attached to looking back, and I have to start looking forward. The last year, has had so many highs, but also so, so many desperate heartbreaking lows. Getting my first ever postive pg test, only for it to be taken away a week later. It was my birthday last week, and all I kept thinking, was that my life should be so different right now. But it's not.
We are looking to start another cycle, but I am just not ready for it right now. I'm not sure I can handle the dissapointment. And the stakes are higher this time, it will be our 2nd and final attempt. It's not a situation I want to deal with right now, I can't comprehend how I will deal with the harsh reality of a childless future.
I only want to be a Mum.
